"If size really mattered, the elephant would be the king of the jungle."
Another one on the special occasion of depression, sadness, ugliness and infinity more.
This is for the ones, who cried themselves to sleep, who cut, who starved themselves, who puked, who felt ugly, who felt alone, and even for the ones who died.
People think depression is sadness. People think depression is crying. People think depression is dressing in black, but people are wrong. Depression is actually the constant feeling of being numb. Being numb to emotions, being numb to lie. You face every obstacle every bloody day and how do you face them? Through medication, through drinking, through cutting.
Why depression, let me mention. I see the absolute cause of depression- obesity, ugliness, bullying, pressure, etc. The cause I'll put up right now is Obesity, or let's say fat, to make it more familiar.
I wish my weight was as low as my self-esteem. I wish I was slim like other girls so that I wasn't so depressed.
I am afraid to die, and afraid to live. Yea, I am afraid to exist too. I'm sorry I am ugly. I'm sorry I am fat. I'm sorry I lie. I'm sorry I cut. I'm sorry I'm broken. I'm sorry I'm damaged. I'm sorry I want to die. I'm sorry for existing. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm the fucked up sorry.
Why why why the hell am I fat? Why the hell don't they understand me? Why the hell don't they see the fear on my face? Why the hell don't they see the pain in my heart? Why the hell don't they see my back-answers as my back-pain. Why the hell do I exist? Aren't fat people successful? Aren't fat people healthy? Aren't they intelligent and strong? Aren't they focused and determined? Dafuq, why don't they just open their eyes? I am fat, that doesn't make me anti-human. I am a God-gifted HUMAN with two eyes, a nose, two ears, a brain and a heart with me. I am fat, that doesn't mean I don't have a heart? C'mon, excuses are for the ones who don't want it have done. I have goals, but THINGS stop me from fulfilling those. I am fat? It's absolutely okay for me. I am ugly? That's better I won't have to show off. I am insane? That makes me a Human. I am crazy? I feel it. I am harsh? I understand the world. I am shy? I rule from behind. I am whatever? I do whatever.
What the hell depression cures us? We are humans, don't let animals steal away your focus. Wr can do it, everyone can do it because our personality matters. We are neither ugly nor stupid. This body of ours, no matter shape or size has carried us through this life. It's taken us to places, enable us to explore the world. Picked up when we've fallen down. Fought through colds and flu, broken bones and broken hearts. Even though we put it down, it keeps on going. Keeps on working to the best it can. Through the good and the bad, our heart has kept beating. It will take us to the very end. What a wonderful clever thing it is! We all are beautiful. We all are brilliant. We all can achieve what we want. The fucking world cannot hold a single finger of yours.
People, I am just a normal 16 year old girl. I have no experiences, no jobs, no breaks, but people, I have brain. A brain that works. The one which works for myself the way I command it to. The power of controlling the brain. I am no physiatrist, but I promise I could talk to you whenever you feel like. I couldn't promise to get through your kins, but I could always help you to relieve your heart by sharing stuff! I'm not someone great, but I can talk to you about anything. I haven't achieved anything, but I understand those little things
. Just try out. I guess you might feel happy and that is my job. It makes me happy :)
Keep working, keep achieving, be happy!
Until the next,
Vidhi
Another one on the special occasion of depression, sadness, ugliness and infinity more.
This is for the ones, who cried themselves to sleep, who cut, who starved themselves, who puked, who felt ugly, who felt alone, and even for the ones who died.
People think depression is sadness. People think depression is crying. People think depression is dressing in black, but people are wrong. Depression is actually the constant feeling of being numb. Being numb to emotions, being numb to lie. You face every obstacle every bloody day and how do you face them? Through medication, through drinking, through cutting.
Why depression, let me mention. I see the absolute cause of depression- obesity, ugliness, bullying, pressure, etc. The cause I'll put up right now is Obesity, or let's say fat, to make it more familiar.
I wish my weight was as low as my self-esteem. I wish I was slim like other girls so that I wasn't so depressed.
Why why why the hell am I fat? Why the hell don't they understand me? Why the hell don't they see the fear on my face? Why the hell don't they see the pain in my heart? Why the hell don't they see my back-answers as my back-pain. Why the hell do I exist? Aren't fat people successful? Aren't fat people healthy? Aren't they intelligent and strong? Aren't they focused and determined? Dafuq, why don't they just open their eyes? I am fat, that doesn't make me anti-human. I am a God-gifted HUMAN with two eyes, a nose, two ears, a brain and a heart with me. I am fat, that doesn't mean I don't have a heart? C'mon, excuses are for the ones who don't want it have done. I have goals, but THINGS stop me from fulfilling those. I am fat? It's absolutely okay for me. I am ugly? That's better I won't have to show off. I am insane? That makes me a Human. I am crazy? I feel it. I am harsh? I understand the world. I am shy? I rule from behind. I am whatever? I do whatever.
What the hell depression cures us? We are humans, don't let animals steal away your focus. Wr can do it, everyone can do it because our personality matters. We are neither ugly nor stupid. This body of ours, no matter shape or size has carried us through this life. It's taken us to places, enable us to explore the world. Picked up when we've fallen down. Fought through colds and flu, broken bones and broken hearts. Even though we put it down, it keeps on going. Keeps on working to the best it can. Through the good and the bad, our heart has kept beating. It will take us to the very end. What a wonderful clever thing it is! We all are beautiful. We all are brilliant. We all can achieve what we want. The fucking world cannot hold a single finger of yours.
People, I am just a normal 16 year old girl. I have no experiences, no jobs, no breaks, but people, I have brain. A brain that works. The one which works for myself the way I command it to. The power of controlling the brain. I am no physiatrist, but I promise I could talk to you whenever you feel like. I couldn't promise to get through your kins, but I could always help you to relieve your heart by sharing stuff! I'm not someone great, but I can talk to you about anything. I haven't achieved anything, but I understand those little things
Keep working, keep achieving, be happy!
Until the next,
Vidhi
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